Probably the most important thing about
growing up in Long Island during the early 2000’s is that I had the pleasure of
growing up when local emo bands were enormously popular.
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| Pictured: Long Island Not Pictured: Sad White Dudes |
As a middle schooler I avoided these bands
like the plague because I didn’t want people to think I wasn’t metal (I was
totally metal, I listened to Slipknot).
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| YEAH! I was cool!... Right? |
But as high school approached - emotions,
hormones, and the mall happened. The music from this Long Island scene became a
big part of me. It may seem lame, and at this point certainly out of style, but
these bands helped me get through some tough times. In fact they still do to
this day.
Human beings are not well equipped to
handle loss. Even if it’s just the breakup of a relationship, letting go is always difficult. And damn, these bands were fucking great at
writing about breakups. They were so good that I have their entire catalogs
ripped and ready to go for whenever I have to deal with being “emo.”
But I wanted to be able to share this
constructively. That is why I’ve compared these Long Island emo bands from the
early 2000’s to the five stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining,
Depression, and Acceptance.
1)
Denial – Taking Back Sunday
“ Don’t believe me when I tell you, it’s
just what anyone would do” – There’s No ‘I’ In Team
Taking Back Sunday embodies denial in many
ways. Hell, even their name denies the existence of Monday as part of the week.
Taking Back Sunday’s first album “Tell All Your Friends” may as well be the
gospel of growing up in Long Island. It deals with teenage breakups that while on
the surface seem superficial, really hurt those involve. After all you’re
14-years-old the only thing you’ve ever known in your life is that you suck at
sports and girls/boys don’t like you. You have nothing to live for but to whine
and complain about how things just CANNOT be this bad. But they are, and they
get worse.
2)
Anger – Glassjaw
“ What causes my laughter at another’s
disaster? It’s the bastard in me” – Lovebites and Razorlines
Glassjaw’s debut album “Everything You Ever
Wanted To Know About Silence” may be the most vitriolic and excessive records
of all time. Glassjaw’s not a band you listen to when you’re upset – they’re a
band you listen to when you’re FUCKING PISSED OFF. The only type of pissed off
that could be caused by a significant other betraying you. If you want to rip
your ex’s head off and torch it, this is the right band for you. Glassjaw still
tours today to sold out crowds mostly because there will always be people pissed
off at their ex’s.
3)
Bargaining – Brand New
“It’s time for you to choose, the bullet or
the chapstick” – The Shower Scene
Brand New best represents bargaining because
they had the most dynamic sound out of all these groups. With influences that
ranged from hardcore to indie, they went from distorted pop punk riffs to borderline
goth rock. No matter what their style, we
can all agree though that their best work deals with heart ache and despair. Their
music makes you ask, “What did I do wrong? What else could I have done for you?
WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME MISERABLE?” Pretty standard among these groups, but Brand
New best represents the middle-ground of grief as they do have plenty of
hopeful songs as well.
4)
Depression – From Autumn to Ashes
“You’re nothing to me” – Reflections
From Autumn to Ashes might have well have
been a straight up metalcore group if it were not for their heart wrenching lyrical
content. Their magnum opus, “Short Stories With Tragic Endies” is 9 minutes of
shock and awe; it’s almost difficult to get through the song without feeling
like your own life is over – but then you realize the song is just about the
end of a relationship, and not about the end of life. Although it seems that
way at the time, you will recover. Which brings me to my next point.
5)
Acceptance – Nightmare of You
“A soaring dove – I’m quite sure this is love”
– Ode to Serotonin
Although part of the Long Island scene,
Nightmare of You had their own niche. They wrote songs about longing for love
and dealing with loss, but there is more positivity to take from them then the
rest of these groups. This is the group you listen to when you’re ready to move
on. But in order to get to acceptance you to need to accept that things have
sucked. Even though things have sucked, what have you learned? It’s okay to
deny the pain at first. It’s okay to feel angry at certain aspects that went
wrong. It’s okay to wonder what could have been. It’s even okay to feel
miserable for a while. But love will find a way. And the best way to realize
that is to curl up in your room like a teenager with your headphones on and get
to your computer and write like a madman and let that inspiration flow through
your fingertips. You’re not going to give up because someone left you. Love
comes and goes, and people flow through your life non-stop. If you stay
miserable, you’re gonna miss out on the good parts.
Thanks to these groups, and others like them,
I’ve been able to handle shitty romantic situations since my pre-teen years. I’ve
had countless girls rip my heart out and step on it – often times stepping on
it repeatedly for years (you know who you are… jerks). But what I learned from
friends, family, and bands like these is that I was never the only person going
through that pain. Empathy is probably the most important thing in humanity.
And being able to relate to others is the best way to move forward.
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